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is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-18, 1:02 pm

guilder
Posts: 2
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Just out of curiosity--and without mentioning names--is it at all common for a lady to orgasm during a session in the RLD? I was with one very amazing lady during my recent trip and she ended up orgasming during our session. I felt her muscles contracting around me and she had to take a breather to collect herself.

Needless to say, I walked away feeling like I was king of the world after that. I wasn't at all aware that anybody other than the person doing the paying was in a position to have an orgasm!

Was it special (like it felt and feels) or is it common?
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-18, 2:17 pm

Frans Hals
Posts: 75
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I think it is quite unusual, but not impossible. It happened to me one time for sure with an Amsterdam provider. We both came together and talked about it afterwards. She said it did not often happen, but that I was her first of the day and that she had just been hoping for "a nice stiff cock" to come along. I had the impression that it happened a couple of times with another girl, but I expect she was just faking.

I think a lot depends on the circumstances. If the girl likes you and particularly if you are the first of the day, or maybe she has had a couple of days off, or maybe she has no boyfriend, it may well occur in Amsterdam, but in general it is not worth trying for, as the girl is more likely to want to get YOU finished off and out the door--so by trying to please her, you will probably just aggravate her.

Funnily enough, just yesterday I received an e-mail from a local provider who I used to see who ALWAYS came with me, but she is a single part-timer who only sees a few clients and would often go days or sometimes weeks without sex. I also saw another girl a while back for whom I was her very first client, and she had not had sex (with another person) for five months. Needless to say, she was ready.

In more relaxed environments like the Dominican Republic, where I have been recently, where all nighters are common, it is perhaps more the rule than the exception as this is more of a girlfriend experience and you have plently of time to develop a relationship with the girl. You also have unlimited time for DATY, which is generally a pleaser.

Also, as the girl having climaxes is a huge plus for me, I am much more likely to repeat with her.
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-18, 4:16 pm

guilder
Posts: 2
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Thank you, Frans, for your comments. And you're right, it makes a regular out of you if the lady enjoys your time with her almost as much as you enjoy your time with her ;)
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-18, 11:16 pm

mojoworksSupporting Member
Supporting Member
Posts: 59
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It isn't common, but it does happen. Carla did last time I was with her. I wish I could say it was my great abilities, but the truth is she brought herself to orgasm after I was done.

Working girls do have a name for it. They call it "getting lucky".

Mojo
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-19, 2:09 pm

greta
Posts: 169
Location: USA
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I KNOW i don't look as hot as the best RLD gals. I'll let the guys on this board who have "had" me (swinging poet, "C" Marc etc) rate my looks - but i'm guessing in those RLD terms i'm a "7" not a "10"

but I promise you that this "provider" orgasms every time !
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-21, 1:38 am

lovebiteSupporting Member
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Posts: 122
Location: Cloud 9, Lovers Ln, Paradise City, Planet Heaven
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That's a good question, and I happened to find out the answers to a few of the mystery questions that were commonly asked for the ladies. They turned out to be pretty much related to one another.

It started out as an innocent question I asked one of the ladies why she put her hand down there while we're doing it. It seemed to be getting in the way. Her answer was that she wanted to feel the condom so that it didn't slip. But I don't think that was the true answer, because when I asked her the follow up question, the truth came out. I said she really got a job that she can really enjoy, isn't that true? Her answer was, It's just a job, and she can't enjoy it. in fact, she said she wouldn't allow herself to come, and it's difficult to do that because it is reserved for the close relationship with her bf. She has to compartmentalize it so that It wouldn't screw up her mind. And this makes perfect sense why they did what they did. Putting the hand in between is to eliminate the stimulation to the clit that could make her come. Avoiding kissing is another way to keep them from losing their soul emotionally to someone who they may never see again.

This really makes perfect sense once I realize how difficult it is for them to be in the business, and compartmentalizing is one of the ways to keep their sanity emotionally. So most of them avoid getting into a sticky position where they get entangled emotionally. So orgasm does occur but that's only when they allow it to happen, or sometimes it just happened and you can't control it.

Now I understand what to expect more because I always wanted them to enjoy it and it is incomplete without that mutual satisfaction. But I may be asking for too much when they are not allowing that to happen.

I think women are not quite like men who can just come and forget about the whole thing later like rabbits. It is much more emotionally involved for them. Kissing is another biggie that even clients can get emotionally involved when that DFK happened while they may be just playing around (and someone may still remember the report last year of how a client got taken away emotionally, falling in love with a RLD girl by a DFK). Kissing is like committing a cardinal sin of getting emotionally involved, more so than avoiding it for health reasons.

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Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-21, 2:12 am

greta
Posts: 169
Location: USA
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fascinating and extremely well-reasoned observations, lovebite

i think that what you say may be very true - as you say - of emotional necessity for the RLD girls. I cannot imagine myself doing that work - but I'm sure that if I did I would want to preserve my emotional base and compartmentalize it as just work. otherwise - how could I have the same response with a bf or husband? That is if one is doing it for the money - as a means of supporting oneself. And I'm certainly not casting aspersions on those who choose to do that.

However - speaking for myself - i don't agree with you about women in general finding orgasms - and the intimacy of kissing as essentially emotional - distinct from pleasure.

I don't know how I compare with other women. But I DO have the ability to separate sex and love. I have a loving relationship with kyle. But I regard sex as a glorious experience. I love to kiss - it IS the most intimate act of all. I love to do it as an act of LUST. I love to have lustful kissing (i call it tongue-fucking) - and have orgasms with the strangers I fuck. I don't regard the kissing or the orgasms as having an emotional context. They are just hot sexual activities that thrill me.

they don't intrude into my sex with kyle - they are just part of the repertoire of sexual pleasure.

I think a lot of women DO have a problem with that - but that is not an internal one - but an external one. It's societal pressure which has a double standard. Guys are encouraged with a wink to sow wild oats. Girls are condemned as sluts if they do the same thing

so a lot of women supress their lustful needs out of guilt - and find themselves with guys to whom they cannot admit their fantasies. They feat that the guy will feel threatened (and they don't wish to inflict that on them) if they have the temerity to lust after another guy - just in their head - or for a one-night stand that most men would not even blink over

i wish and hope that more women - especially in good solid relationships will feel empowered to seek to satisfy our lustful desires - just like men....

greta
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-21, 8:05 pm

North
Posts: 3
Location: Up north
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That was VERY interesting, lovebite! I've always been convinced that the hand down there is just a "condom check" thing, but it actually makes sense that it might be to protect the clit. I mean, if it was just the condom it would be enough to check it every once in a while and before climax.

Then again, maybe we shouldn't assume that it's just to avoid unwanted coming. Since the clit is so sensitive it's probably tiresome to have it stimulated for hours every day, even if the girl wouldn't have any orgasms during that time.
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-21, 9:16 pm

CockOfTheNorth
Posts: 1
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so much for "The customer always comes first"

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bouncy bouncy bouncy bouncy na na na na

FIGJAM
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-21, 9:25 pm

greta
Posts: 169
Location: USA
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as Mel Brooks once said

first served first come....
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-21, 10:02 pm

lovebiteSupporting Member
Supporting Member
Posts: 122
Location: Cloud 9, Lovers Ln, Paradise City, Planet Heaven
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I agree with you all in your viewpoints. Yes, Greta, I know I was overgeneralizing it a bit in the women's view of emotional attachment with pleasure-seeking activities. I was very conscious of the fact that it is contrary to what I wrote, because I know women can enjoy all these sexual pleasure just like men without those attachments. I know I'm not a woman and I cannot speak for them, but in many ways, I'm very in tune with how they feel.

There were too many occasions that I noticed that, now to think of it, the ladies all of a sudden stopped in the peak-of-the-moment to take a break. It happened just too many times to be a coincident. It was just at the moment that they were going to come, and aborted it right away. I even remembered an incidence of a real moan leading to an orgasm, but all of a sudden, she switched to a fake moan to abort the real one. I can tell a real moan from a fake one because it was just too clear an attempt to switch gear. That happened even when her hand was down there. She did everything she could to stop the orgasm from happening. I sensed that because I do pay a lot of attention to how they feel, and I often don't feel it's complete without the shared experience, so I do take the time to pleasure them and enjoy seeing them enjoying it.

I agree with you, Greta, that women can enjoy sexual pleasure in a playful way without getting emotionally attached, just like men. I don't have any doubts in that. I think the situation in RLD is that, somehow you have to draw the line somewhere to work in the profession. You have to draw that line, whatever that line is -- be it orgasm or kissing. Otherwise, it would be just toying too much with your own soul to maintain some sanity for yourself. I think for those who allow themselves to experience the pleasure of orgasm and kissing probably find other ways to compartmentalize the difference between casual sex and committed loving relationships.

I also can see how difficult it is for them to compartmentalize it like that, but I think it's necessary. It really hits home when I found myself having to compartmentalize like that too, otherwise, I could get myself into a big mess if I don't draw that line emotionally, separating out the head from the heart. It is a fine line to walk on. I'm very open to talk about these things, so I know I can avoid getting confused. There are a lot of privacy involved, so I'm not going to delve into that. All I can say is that it is very special to come together.

For those ladies in the past who I brought them to orgasm in DATY are the ones who I had connected with them very much emotionally to do that. And I know they would come even before we started because they allowed me to, for being in a trusted relationship that is beyond the casual S&F. It took a long time to develop to that point. In either case, one was to enjoy the fun, and in another case, it was about caring enough to give her the pleasure that she deserves. Those were the sweet ladies who had left the scene many years ago. So I agree that women can enjoy sex in a pleasurable way without necessarily getting emotionally entangled, and enjoy lust as you put it, and move on like men do.

I agree with you, North, too that they get sore too from all those actions, so we shouldn't generalize it too much that they do it to avoid overstimulation. It's true that too many times, my lady had asked me to give her pussy some rest when we were on 2 hr plus marathon sessions, and we have to take breaks even though I could go on forever. I sometimes get oblivious to the fact that they do this day in and day out, and forget how sore it could get.

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dreambite and realitybite...
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-29, 4:14 am

lovebiteSupporting Member
Supporting Member
Posts: 122
Location: Cloud 9, Lovers Ln, Paradise City, Planet Heaven
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"Come together, right now, over me..." What's the name of that song?

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dreambite and realitybite...
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-29, 1:48 pm

paniked Power Kat
Posts: 1376
Location: Amsterdam
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Quote:
as Mel Brooks once said

first served first come....


ah, classic! -- the sign for the Roman orgy in "History of the World Part I"

-paniked

_________________
"De kinderen fietsen naar school, zij roken dikke sigaren en slaan de leraren. Ja, dat is Amsterdam!"
"So high you couldn't reach me with a fuckin' antenna"
Re: is it common for a provider to orgasm?
Posted: 2004-03-29, 1:50 pm

paniked Power Kat
Posts: 1376
Location: Amsterdam
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Quote:
"Come together, right now, over me..." What's the name of that song?


I hope the question is a rhetorical one! that would be The Beatles' "Come Together"

-paniked

_________________
"De kinderen fietsen naar school, zij roken dikke sigaren en slaan de leraren. Ja, dat is Amsterdam!"
"So high you couldn't reach me with a fuckin' antenna"
Why is it important?
Posted: 2005-09-25, 1:02 am

MikeDeHavillandSupporting Member
Supporting Member
Posts: 635
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I hate to sound like a sour pus, but you are paying for it, so providing she gives you a good time, what does it matter?

As Agnieshka said to me once.. "When you have orgasm, I have proof. When I have Orgasm, my clients never know, there is no proof and I don't tell them". Which she signed off with a wicked smile.

I know every guy wants to think he is God's gift to Women, but if Girls want to come and they know how, then they can. If they dont want to come, they won't. Sometimes they can't control it and they have to come (as we have established), but women and men are are just the same.

The physiological cause of Orgasm is exactly the same and the nerve structure is exactly the same.

Also, men, just like women, who have tons of sex also get desensitised and come less often and take longer to come when they do come.

When men have the problem, its called ejaculatory incompetence. When women have the problem its called male incompetence. (An anti-male double standard).
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