Chicago Couple wrote:
My vagina always seems to want to have something inserted in it. My mouth also, and my anus not quite as much.
What should I do? Is this normal?
Hoping this is an advice column and you can help me out.
--Chicago Girl, wondering what to do
And do you have some kind of probe you can use to take my temperature?
Hey Chicago Girl
You've come to the right place....who better to ask for advice and help than a Doctor who's dedicated his life to the juiciest parts of the female anatomy!
As for your specific queries let the good doctor put your mind at rest....your condition is perfectly normal and decidedly healthy for your mental and physical well being, in fact whilst I can't guarantee it I would say if you keep on as your going you'll be around until you're at least 100!
What should you do you ask? Keep going as you are but step it up a few notches...we're put on this earth for a good time not a long time so no point in holding back. From this day forward your motto is " so many cocks....so little time!"
The only thing that worries me is that poor little bum feeling neglected and left out of the party,and let's face it when the good lord made woman the fact that he placed that lovely little anus right beside miss pussy and packed it with all those sensory nerve endings was not coincidental....no sireee...it was put were it was to get it's fair share of the action! For some reason...probably the nice weed I'm smoking, your poor neglected and without having seen it,dare I say....lovely..little bum reminds me of that final scene in Dirty Dancing were Patrick Swayze playing johnny strides through the dancefloor to Jennifer Grey and says " nobody puts Baby in the corner" .
I sort of see your little bum as Baby....so in short CC you're getting into the milfish 30's time to cut out the mother Theresa act and be a proper filthy girl....you know you love it! :-) .
But heed the Doctors warning operating around and within that lovely little orifice is an art in itself and a skilled art at that....best left to those few that know what they're at! :-)
So in summary,my conclusion and diagnosis is cock,cock and even more cock in all three of those lovely little orifices you naughty young lady and as we say in Ireland "fair play to ya lassie"
Sorry I can't be more helpful it's hard to diagnose from a distance....did I mention...I'm available in Amsterdam on a regular basis for private consultations. I normally charge a fortune but as you're a longtime member and contributor to
this fine site,a horny girl that has given countless of our members serious boners reading your trip reports from days gone by and because there must be some Irish blood in ya my girl if you're from Chicago, I would be more than happy to give you a freebie consultation/examination to put your mind at rest!
And as for taking your temperature young lady, as you would expect from an eminent doctor I do indeed have a couple of highly sensitive probes accurate to 0.00001 degree sensitive....but only if inserted as deep as humanly possible!
PS you might find my most recent published paper in the British Medical Journal of interest,it's titled " So Ladies,You're Sure You Can't Squirt....Just Give A Minute To Put On My Waders!" :-)))