Ok, I started reading this webpage at 1 am this morning, its now 14:15 the following day....

<<It's now 16:35 as I edit this message>>

What can I say I was bored and feeling a little low, fancied a trip down memory lane to a place that always makes me happy ;) Now I want to create some new memories!!

I have lol'd (yes really) and been hugely entertained by people's experiances for the last 13 hours as well as drinking too much coffee and smoked a deck of fags... (Well it's ok for you Withnail, you live there).

Can I ask a few questions?? well I'm going to anyway, just hoping for some answers...

1. what is <<cowgirl??>> found a new term that i didn't know in the terms and TLA's never knew "russian" (TJ) before I read them. ( and surely 69 is the 20th set of two digits in pye as 6 on its own would be 40 ;) Well I did say I'd spent all night reading!!

2. Is the IBC trade show (9th - 15th Sept) the only hotel cramming event in AD in the aug/sept/oct 05??

3. Any recomendations on the cheapest hotel room for someone on an extreme budget AND the cheapest hotel room with a toilet and shower I'll look myself on the net etc... but recomendations would be cool. as long as its clean im not fussy I'll have my eyes closed whilst im there.) Less on bills means more on FUN!!

4. Is it always grey miserable or actually raining in DAM??? I'm sure it was over the 20 days I've been there ;) Take a waterproof, possibly a brolly too.

5. Will the Dutch use anything that has a wheel?? I've seen unicycles, 4 people on a pushbike... someone with 1 rollerskate... anycase I digress.

and just two things I'd like to say... 00 now called KHJ very useful to know... we spent all day looking for 00 back in about '95 then eventually found it, in the betty boo, right opposite our hotel!!

And finally I would like to say THE GRASSHOPPER - yes for those that goto AD more than my 3 times in 10 years I understand what your saying, but to me its a tradition, goto the grasshoppper, have my first toke on my overpriced 1g packet of Jack Herra (Ok the first time ever in AD I bought 5g; that stung when I saw the prices elsewhere) and watch the newbie tourists and their furtive looks, watch them try to find the menu hidden by glass which needs to be backlight with that button it's all fun... and HELL I AM A TOURIST!!!! so I'll probably do it all again.... then after coffee its off to find the hotel and dump my bags, before going to find 5g somewhere different... This time if I can find the money to have a short break will definetly be checking out the greenhouse (centrum). (Tues - tues sounds good, tues - t - thurs sounds better). This time though I'm taking a good map and an agenda!! which i probably won't follow but at least i won't be wandering so aimlessly!!

Thanks a lot to anyone that replies.... especially if its Withnail... He does seem to put a lot into this site / forums.

Twisel

PS Bonus points for guessing why my name is twisel (The advantage will be to anyone who is over 45 - 50!!)

found cowgirl on an erotic dictionary

Cowgirl (noun)
A sexual position in which the female sits atop and facing the head of a male, who is lying on his back.

My girlfriend's favorite position is the cowgirl.

thought as much

Twisel

Oh my god I do the same thing, gto right to the Grasshopper every time I go to A'dam. Been doing it for about 10 yrs now. I always go there first. I know it's over priced but it's tradition.

so glad I'm not the only one... thought I was gonna get a major slating for saying that I go there!!

hi twisel (i wonder if its nod to sir walter scott?)

im glad you have been enjoying the site and that it brought back happy memories for you. i also like to occasionally refer back to reports i wrote over the past 7 years to remind myself of experiences long forgotten by my ravaged memory banks. good thing i still have a lot of them on file - maybe at some point ill run a series of 'best of...' posts?

the IBC is certainly the biggest convention in town but there are also other events which help to swell tourist numbers during this period. at the moment you have the sail2005 event going on. in fact im sat typing this looking out over the Ij harbour which is filled with galleons, tall ships and smaller craft decked in all manner of flags and regalia. i shall be out there myself a little later on swanning around in a boat before hooking up with our board friend fallen buddha for a few convivial herbs and beers. anyway the town is packed to the rafters with beds very hard to find. next week sees the beginning of uitmarkt, the event which heralds the beginning of the cultural season. again the town should be heaving, particularly around the leidseplein / vondelpark area.

for cheap rooms its a question of door knocking and phone ringing. getting slightly out of the centre is advisable as you will come across many smaller places which receive little or no publicity in the wider sense. there are way too many to list but a quick web search should bring up some listings even if there is little info to go on. this list, coupled with a map and a little exploration should see you ok.

so far as the dutch love of bikes goes i have to say that i am absolutely in love with my new oma fiets whom i have christened Eva. you really do see all shapes and sizes and designs as you move around the city. in fact i was having my hair cut the other day and as i sat there i noticed a guy wheeling by on a unicycle. not one person batted an eyelid as this dude cruised by, just an everyday thing for amsterdammers. in the uk or elsewhere people would react as though the circus was passing by!

as for the grasshopper...hmmm.....we'll let that one pass just this once ;-) im afraid i really cannot concur with your enthusiasm for the place. however it seems you are not alone so maybe i am missing something? i prefer somewhere a little more low key or less touristy personally but the great thing about this site is the diverse viewpoint you get of the city in general with everybody chiming in their own recommendations.

i hope you continue to enjoy ignatzmice.com and look forward to your future contributions.

groetjes from amsterdam!

withnail

thanks for the reply Withnail, it means a lot , as I've appreciated your writings and unique viewpoint from living there rather than snatching a few brief glimpses like we do staying for a few days at a time.

Having done a little research I have found available accomadation at the "Art Gallery"... not sure about not haveing en suite but with a £180 premium for my stay that works out as £12 a shit!!! so I gues I'll suffer the inconveinience.... Anybody got any comments on the Art gallery??
Previously I've stayed at the termius, the one opposite Bettie Boo coffee shop across the paved large seating area and Le coin. I must say le Coin was a bargin... twin room and you needed binoculars to see the far side of the room which had a 3 piece suite (2 sofa's) down there by the tv.

So now its just a case of if I can justify all those pennies to get there and still have enough left over for some fun!! I must admit I'm being greedy, I want to stay for 8 nights 9 days.

I will try to clarify my opinions on the grasshopper.... I wouldn't go there after the first hour of being in DAM or before the last... and I also wouldn't expect you to agree.... I certainly wouldn't go in there if I had the good fortune to work in DAM.... speaking of which... Do you know of any Jobs going out there?? or how I might go about looking for one?? I don't speak any Hollandse (told you I've read an awful lot of this site (the how not to offend the dutch)) and I'm not sure how transferable my IT skills would be if their OS's are all written in foreign.

In fact one year we didn't make it as far as the grasshopper but stopped briefly in a coffee shop in sight of Central station but we had a really bad vibe from a group of coloured guys and no it wasn't paranoyia, we'd only just gotten there!! So we left grasshopper'd and then found our hotel.... which wasn't!! (but again another story for another time.)

Speaking of the not to offend the dutch we were terrible at getting up in the morning (surprise, surprise) and it was always impossible to tell the maid that we'll be out in 5 minutes, despite trying in French, German & English (and sign language)!! so it is true, maybe I shouldn't have started with German or maybe the maid was an immigrant herself?? I have a similar story about sugar.... but not only did you have to be there, you probably had to be half baked as well.

One thing I did notice about DAM (or didn't) was where to buy 200 ciggarrettes at a time... there didn't seem to be a ciggie counter in the supermarket up the escalator if you know where I mean?? Any clues??

twisel,

You are not alone on this as I follow the same steps year after year, after arriving at Schiphol I eagerly board the train to Centraal Station and within minutes I arrive, the Hotel Ibis when you exit to the right is where I park myself for the fun filled exciting days ahead. After I check in and dump the luggage, my itinerary consists of exchanging my week US Dollars to Euros and down Damrak I go to the nearest gift shop, purchase a lighter and smoking tools "pipe and papers" then exit just across the street to the Grasshopper. By this time I am anxious to toke and for the first stop its quick, easy and if you browse through the buds there is typically a good blend to be found. The Grasshopper has a casual atmosphere, the place is clean and the staff has always been kind, very social and even if the prices are higher, its always been my starting point. My typical stay at the Grasshopper is about 30 minutes, enough to get a good high and then its off to Barney's to pick up some nice buds, sample some good hasj and toke a bit more, follow up by dropping into de Dampkring and some other notable "recent" cannabis cup winning shops. After getting nice and loaded, I trek down the street to Sauna Deco so I can warm up, take a steam and sauna, look at some local Dutch trim in the buff and relax, then its time to do some window shopping! When I was a kid I loved Disneyland and still do in a way, however I have found a new adventureland, fantasyland and tomorrowland, its my pleasureland, called Amsterdam!

Lang Leve Nederlands!

Joecaddy.....